Dungeons is for Dragons
by Illidan-Nerdrage
Summary: Behind every great hero, there is a group of loyal fans that do all the work. This is the tale of Eavani, an avariel who, despite her potential for being a major circus attraction, had accomplished nothing until Daeghun kicked her out of the house.


First chapter replaced with new first chapter!

Cause I thought the previous one was boring and unneccessary. I'm still ashamed by it.

Alright. This is just some fun I'm having with the story of the beloved Kalach-Cha and her band of bro's and ho's. Its intended to be funny, mostly, and to explore the concept of character developement and creative writing and yadda yadda. I'm taking liberties here, if you don't agree with that or simply don't find it entertaining at all then move on, nothing to see here.

It will not be a long retelling of the main campaign that we all know backwards by now, but hopefully just some shots at things that happen inbetween everything else.

I dont own any of these chumps except Eavani. Clearly.

Lastly, thank you for taking the time to read this. And if you don't take the time for it, no hard feelings!

* * *

**Beetle Legs**

"This is the worst day ever." Eavani sat on a rock and kicked a smaller rock. As if it wasn't enough that swamp moss started growing between her toes, her headache had only gotten worse since they left the village.

**"**You don't _say_!" Bevil breathed as he made sure the last of the beetles were really dead. "Should've known things wouldn't turn out right the second you missed that first bottle at the archery contest. First the village is attacked by monsters, then Amy dies and then suddenly your father sends us out on some kinda... mission, where we have to fight _beetles_ the size of _ponies_!"

He sheathed his sword and kicked one of the carcasses into the water. It made a plopping sound that seemed to echo into the night, and Eavani shuddered. The marsh was even more creepy at night; the sounds coming from deep within the forest that were normally drowned out by the chatter of people, were quite audible now that there was no civilization around. She was sure she could hear the moaning of ghosts somewhere far ahead, or maybe it was just a dying animal.

**"**And it wouldn't hurt you to help out a little!"

**"**I have a headache."

**"**Like I haven't heard _that _before..." He put his foot on a beetle's belly and ripped its leg off. He frowned before putting it in his satchel and then did the same with the rest of the dead beetles.

**"**It's just a few creepy crawlies, Bevil." The avariel rolled her eyes. "And why are you mutilating them?"

**"**Tarmas. Can you believe him? Amy's corpse is barely cold and he wants beetle legs for his alchemy." He closed up his satchel, wrinkling his nose as the odor blew into his face, and slung it over his shoulder.

**"**Right. Didn't he ask you to do that like a week ago?"

**"**Yeah? What, do you expect me to get back out here after _this_?!" Bevil stared at her, then at the surroundings, then back at her. "There are lizardlings out here, with _spears_ and with _bows_. And then there is the swamp elf..." Bevil shuddered, and he suddenly seemed more frightened of his own mind than of the swamp.

That Bevil was nervous made her nervous. Not that he was usually the picture of bravery, but a soldier shouldn't be so easily unnerved by the lands and creatures that was so well known to them, and especially not by Georg's wild tales. Eavani put her hands together and leaned her chin on them, but the smell of beetle juice and rot already clung to her skin and her clothes, so she quickly put her hands down and got to her feet instead.

"Perhaps we should move on then, before the marsh-fungus gets us." Eavani brushed the dirt off of the back of her robes and grabbed her staff, a piece of mott-eaten driftwood that supposedly once belonged to her mother.

"Yes, these legs should be enough for that damned wizard."

"Didn't he ask for beetle _eggs, _though?" She recalled then.

Bevil sighed, dropping his satchel to the ground with a thump "Darn it..."


End file.
